Although death is one of the things that are certain in life, most if not all
people still find it difficult to deal with it when placed in this situation.
Grieving for the death of a loved one is a long process that takes time and
acceptance. However, with the help and concern of other people, this process is
made a little easier for the people who are in grief.
During funerals, many people are careful about the words they say or actions
they do in front of the grieving family members. Generally, the attendees do not
want to give additional grief to those affected, hence the tendency is to keep
quiet and simply extend their support silently. People who attend funerals must
be aware of the proper etiquettes to be observed during this time and observe
the do’s and don’ts.
The most common and sincere way of extending your sympathy is to say “I am
sorry” to the bereaved for his loss. These three words are enough to convey to
the grieving person that you understand the importance of the deceased person in
his life and that you share his sadness. These words are enough to show that you
sincerely care for the bereaved.
More than talking, listening is very important during funerals. Studies show
that people who have suffered losses accept their situation quickly with the
help of other people who are willing to listen and help them deal with their
grief. During this period, the bereaved needs to express his sadness and anger
together with the memories of the deceased person. The need to talk is an outlet
of letting out all of their feelings about the situation. A person does a lot of
help simply by listening. It is best not to push the bereaved to talk about his
lost loved one rather this should be a spontaneous thing. You should refer to
the deceased person by name, using no other terms. Memories are bound to come up
during your conversation with the aggrieved, and no matter how repetitive it
might become, just try to be patient in listening.
Nonverbal actions are equally important during funerals. A gentle, sincere hug
or a shoulder to cry on is what a bereaved person needs to feel to know that he
is not alone in his grief. Death brings out the vulnerability of every person
hence the simplest touch could be a source of strength for the grieving people.
Grieving is normal as it forms part of our complex emotions as human beings.
Grief is not something we can simply set aside. During funerals, it is suggested
that you ask the bereaved if you can do anything to help them. Even if they do
not have anything in mind, it helps a lot on the part of a grieving person to
know that he is surrounded by friends that care for his welfare. Support in
whatever form will be greatly appreciated by the bereaved and will weigh
favorably on their acceptance of their situation. Death is hard to accept but
can be made easier by the love extended by people who truly care.